To Do

Overwhelmed with my day to day To Do Lists, I’ve decided to make a Life To Do List. Large-scale, likely unachievable, highly unbelievable, and grossly over exaggerated seems like the way to go. If I’m going to make a list of things I’d like to achieve in my lifetime, I think it makes the most sense to either make a monumentally long list of easily attainable goals so as to never run out, or a relatively short list with tough to achieve goals. And since I’m lazy, short wins!

So, I’ll jump right in with “Climbing a Mountain.” So...doable...eventually, and with much training and dedication. I’m not thinking of any mountain in particular, as…..well, I’m not that familiar with mountains. There’s Everest, Vesuvius. Yeah, that’s about the extent of my mountain knowledge.

And Lord knows a list of this magnitude can’t be complete without “Writing a Book”. So…..there it is. I’d like to write a book. I’ll go one step further and say I’d like said book to get published. Maybe it’ll be about the full-time, OCD, vein, impatient, overly-critical, somewhat-judgmental, yet mostly-happy mom of 5 who climbed a mountain. I’d read it.

Next, I’d like to take my kids to Disney World. Now, this strikes me as the most reachable goal, but for my already-stressed checking account. 7 people traveling 2 days to Disney World, staying in a moderate hotel room, and all visiting the park for a couple days? My credit card companies are already giddy with anticipation.

That brings me to NEVER winning the lottery. Yup, I don’t ever want to receive a large sum of money that didn’t result from working my butt off. Other than my rear end in dire need of refining, I’m convinced nothing good can or will ever come from that sort of windfall. People change, families change, friends change, and rarely are any of those for the better. Now, immediately this seems like a ridiculous goal. I mean, it should be as simple as just never buying a lottery ticket. Problem solved. However, we have gracious, loving, generous family members who consider it a pleasant surprise to present loved ones with a ticket to the latest shot at free Millions. And quite simply, I don’t have the heart to reject their kind gesture. Which brings me here, and it’s really more of a hope or a dream. I’m game for increasing the Child Tax Credit, granting automatic financial aid for furthering the education of kids from large families, or even free groceries for any length of time. Any of those, I can live with. And appreciate.

So, let’s see, I’ve covered physical goals, intellectual goals, parenting goals, and monetary goals. I’d say that just about covers it, except maybe one last superficial want of an exhausted, sweatpants donning, mop-wielding mom. I want my team to win Fantasy Football just once. That’s it: one victory over the 11 arrogant, statistic-spouting, smack-talking men who likely only invited me into their league as an easy obstacle on their own quests for victory.

Here goes…